Champ Car Race Narrowly Misses a Zero TV Rating

Champ Car's quest for the illusive zero TV rating was spoiled last weekend by a 58-year-old housewife in suburban Memphis.

News reports that Mrs. Katherine Pemberton of suburban Memphis accidentally had ESPN Classic on while cleaning her pet guinea pig's cage. That statistical blip derailed Champ Car's apparent drive to televise a race and have zero -- none, zilch, nada -- people watch it.

"Accidents happen," said one Champ Car official. "We plan to go back to the drawing board, come up with some more insane moves to turn off our dwindling fan base, and broadcast the Mexico City race, if it still happens, on local cable access in Bismark, ND at 3 a.m. We're pretty sure that get us the zero. The only danger is  someone tuning in looking for the weather."

Officials with the Bismark cable system said the plan is far from a done deal. "We're planning to run a tape replay of a City Council hearing on waste water treatment options at that time. Frankly, there's been more interest in that than the Champ Car thing, so we're torn. There's been some talk that Champ Car would do a time buy. We're in negotiations right now so I can't comment further on that."

Champ Car officials plan to lobby TV rating officials to make the rule that someone has to tune in for "more than seven minutes" in order to count on the rating meter.

Comments

[mmack]

Pressdog,

I ruined Champ Car's chances to go 0.0 for 2 on the Nielsen ratings. I watched the last 20 minutes of the Surfer's Paradise race rerun on ESPN2 Sunday night.

I believe that bumped the ratings for the rebroadcast to .00000000000001. My only excuse was that The Weather Channel was rerunning "When Weather Attacks".

[Jerry]

The Champ Car race was televised? Wow, I have to dig deeper into the TV listings.

[John]

I am having such strong IRL withdrawl, I thought about watching the chump cars, did not actually do it. Maybe if I watched with one eye, no glasses and squint I can trick myself that it is an IRL race. What can I do?

(Freaking funny website)

[pressdog]

I taped the Champ Car race and watched the first 20-ish laps so far. Dozed off a couple of times. Seriously. I'll try hard to get through it soon. Not sure what the point is at this point, but it's a pride thing with me now.

[Johnny]

*it's a pride thing with me now.*

I was there once too. Just walk into the light...

[leilani]

pressdog, you are too funny. thanks for the laugh today. i needed it. :)

[mmack]

"I taped the Champ Car race and watched the first 20-ish laps so far. Dozed off a couple of times."

Pressdog, were you "enhancing your race viewing" with a few too many Foster's "Oil Cans", perhaps?

[mmack]

BTW Pressdog, it's not like getting a recap out today is a pressing priority, what with TWO WEEKS until the next race at Mexico City on November 11th (Shown live on Lifetime or the Oxygen Channel, I believe).

P.S. Everyone else: Don't slip up and tell Pressdog how the race ends.