-- story by Leilani Münter --
For the third year in a row, open wheel racing insider and international man of mystery pressdog has topped sports coverage internet ratings, much to the dismay of sports giants ESPN and Sports Illustrated.
"I don't understand it," ESPN editor in chief Gary Belsky said, "We have always prided ourselves on the fact that we make open wheel fans click on the "NASCAR" tab in order to get any news on open wheel. We look at it as a way to really slap open wheel fans in the face and let them know Americans care more about Dale Jr than Helio Castroneves. We didn't realize it could backfire on us like this. Who is this pressdog guy anyway?"
"I guess I really underestimated the popularity of sarcasm," said SI sports writer Bruce Martin, "I'm not really sure how it works, but apparently people really take to it. We have hired some researchers to look into it. I plan on adding a few sarcastic comments into my stories to see if it'll help SI's ratings some. We'll just have to see what happens."
In a rare interview, the man behind pressdog, Bill Zahren made just one statement, "My parents always told me that sarcasm is a gift and it just comes naturally to me. I have always lived by the words of Yoda - do or do not, there is no try."
Jay Adamczyk otherwise known as Jayski, fendered racing's Perez Hilton, could not be reached for comment.
Life is short. Race hard. Live Green.