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Champ Car ESPN Deal Part of Covert Unification Drive

Note to the gullible: everything below is made up.

The multi-year agreement between the Champ Car World Series and ESPN is really part of a stealth unification scheme, according to multiple sources within both series.

"The ESPN deal is just the tip of the iceberg," said one IRL insider. "Underneath the water line a bunch of us are working toward merging together one little thing at a time, when no one is looking. We plan to eventually tell (IRL chief) Tony Geroge (left) about it once everything is unified, maybe bring it up during a round of golf. Like, 'Hey, Tony, a bunch of us went ahead and got that unification thing out of the way.' " 

Open-wheel Racing Mulls Making all Hiring Decisions Based on Sponsorship

Come on. Do I have to? OK. Everything below is made up. Sheesh.

The jobs of engineers, pit crews, PR people, even transport hauler drivers in the Indy Racing League and Champ Car World Series may soon be determined by how much sponsorship the applicant can bring to the table. 

Notes from Champ Car World Series in Mexico City 2006

Notes taken during the SPEED broadcast of Champ Car World Series Grand Premio Telmex presented by Banmex, Mexico City on 11/12/06.

pressdog's muy frio beer of the race is race sponsor Tecate. Una cerveza muy excelente.

Tracy Mulls Snake River Cannon Jump

It's seem silly to have to say this, but 99% of everything below is made up.

Champ Car World Series veteran Paul Tracy is preparing to jump the Snake River Cannon in a golf cart, according to sources close to the driver.

Speculation has swirled since the weekend of Nov. 4 when Tracy (show at right modeling a possible jumping costume) broke his shoulder blade in an accident in his home town of Las Vegas.

pressdog Lauches Free Danica! Campaign

Photo: Shawn Payne and Indy Racing League
Reacting angrily to rumors of oppressive sponsor behavior, pressdog today formally launched a "Free Danica!" campaign.

"It's just wrong man," said obscure racing blogger pressdog. "Danica wants to run the Daytona test so she should be able to run the Daytona test. I mean, why is everyone getting so knotted up about it? You know what that is? It's The Man, bringing her down. We gotta stick it to the man."

Jeff of IRL Lays Down Some ROI Smack

Our boy Jeff at My Name is IRL is laying down some smack about the Indy Racing League's apparent indifference to the incredibly negative ROI that comes from sponsoring many of its teams. The lack of real steps to help reduce the cost of competing (competing for the win, not just showing up to finish behind Ganassi and Penske) makes us wonder if everyone at IRL HQ is drinking cheap Scotch all day or what.

Check Jeff immediately. Go on Jeff, you tell 'em. Get down with your bad self.

The Iceman Spaketh

The blogosphere cried out for a few, measured words from Scott Dixon (left), who responded by talking about Honda power, Kiwi beer and his stoic demeanor.

Mega props to Ganassi PR Czarina Pat for getting these 100%, swear-to-God real answers from the freakishly fast New Zealander who won the 2003 Indy Racing League points championship.

pressdog: You seem eerily calm before, during and after the race. What's up with that? Do you go back to the trailer and scream and yell and fist pump when nobody is looking or is the calm guy just the Real Scott Dixon?

Dixon: That's just me. I don't take life too seriously... we don't get out of it alive