Note to the easily fooled: this is satire.
The Champ Car World Series will soon begin a "reverse purse" system helps ride buyers "pay less if they drive well."
"We see this as a natural evolution of where the league is going," said one Champ Car official who asked not to be named. "Since basically everyone buys their rides in Champ Car, we kind of figured why should the good drivers be soaked as much as the bad drivers?"
To give drivers incentive to perform, the league has announced that the cost of rides will be inversely proportional to the average finish.
The system does away with prize money and instead institutes a system wherein drivers are billed based on how they finished. So a driver who finish first in a race will be billed for his or her ride at a lower rate than a driver that finishes 17th.
"We hope that this will help relieve good drivers of having to come up with every dollar the team will ever need," said the Champ Car official. "Crappy drivers on crappy teams will still have to bring about $8 million with them in order to have the privilege of driving in our league and finishing 15th, but that's nothing new."
In other news, a meeting of open-wheel leaders to assess the main threats to American open-wheel racing unanimously decided that the biggest threat was, in fact, the Champ Car World Series. "If a series can manage to drive Alex Tagliani to stock car racing, well, that's pretty much the doomsday device of open-wheel racing."
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Your best work yet!
Posted by: Zappatista | October 04, 2007 at 07:53 AM
Pressdog,
It took me a minute to realize that this wasn't an actual press release from Champ Car's Three Amigos, as it sounds about as good as any idea they've come up with lately. Is there a corresponding "Reverse Fee" program for promoters as well? That's the plan where the licensing fees charged to track owners and promoters would be lower for Champ Car races that actually happen instead of being announced and cancelled before they happen.
Posted by: mmack | October 04, 2007 at 08:36 AM
This plan will never work. For all interested ride-buyers, please see me, Tony George. Our new welfare program will certainly benefit you as it will certainly help our ride buyers, such as Scott Sharp, Panasonic boy, and of course, my personal favorite, "Special" Ed Carpenter! Please contact me if interested.
Posted by: Tony George | October 04, 2007 at 09:14 PM
i love you for this post. --lol--
Posted by: john clerk | October 05, 2007 at 01:01 PM
Champcarfanatics need a hug.
Posted by: LGS | October 05, 2007 at 04:44 PM
Take it easy there, "Tony." We all know ride buying is epidemic in both leagues. Remain calm.
Posted by: pressdog | October 06, 2007 at 08:36 AM
This is SO timely. No wonder all the good drivers are leaving for the IRL or NASCAR or Grand AM or ANYONE that will even PAY them for their skills.
Champ Car is for all intents and purposes, done. Will the last one to leave CC please turn out the lights, this is getting embarrasing!
Posted by: Harvey Pelovsky | October 08, 2007 at 04:14 PM
Dog...I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Why? It is likely closer to the truth than some deluded Champ Car fans want to realize....
Posted by: Mark in Bowmanville | October 08, 2007 at 11:44 PM