IndyCar Headquarters Reportedly Overrun by Insurance Salespersons

Indianapolis news stations are reporting that the IndyCar headquarters has been overrun by insurance salespeople.

"We got brief cases and suits and ties everywhere" said one harried TV reporter as two well suited agents began beating each other with briefcases in the background. "Ever since IndyCar's Randy Bernard started tossing insurance policies around in public, headquarters has been overrun with certified underwriters."

The mob scene apparently broke out shortly after Bernard announced a second huge cash payout that would be funded by an insurance policy.

Last year Bernard offered $20 million to anyone who could win the Indy 500 AND NASCAR's Coke 600 on the same day. It's common for such huge prizes -- from a car won for a hole-in-one to $20M for winning a race -- to be funded by insurance policies.

The league would purchase the policy for much less than $20 million. The price of the policy would be determined by the odds of someone winning the $20 million, in this case about a bazillion to one.

"We had a little ripple of excitement in the insurance community after the $20 million announcement," said an IndyCar insider who asked not to be named, "but when the second one came out, all actuarial hell broke loose."

The "second one" was an offer by Randy Bernard to pay $5 million to any non-IndyCar driver (but including former IndyCar drivers deemed "legends") if he (or she) could win the IndyCar finale in Las Vegas this October.

Again, an insurance policy would be purchased that would pay teh $5 million if an outsider/legend managed to win it.

"I had no idea there were so many insurance agents around," said the insider. "Some of their ideas were kind of interesting, actually. I think we're taking proposals."

pressdog.com has learned some of the insurance-funded lotto-like proposals being floated included ..

• DRINK ye BASTARDS Challenge -- $100,000 to anyone who can drink a case of non-light beer within a defined period without urinating.

• Pass in the Corners at Indy Championship -- $1.5 million for any car who can pull off a pass in a corner at Indy under green with both cars going at least 95% of the leader's speed without hitting the wall.

• 2.0 Ratings Cash Bananza -- Selecting a fan at random to win $1 million if ratings for any non-Indy 500 race reaches 2.0 TV ratings.

• Death Star One-in-a-Million Shot, Kid -- A $3 million bonus to any non-big-three team to win on a 1.5 mile oval. Although this hasn't happened since 2005, IndyCar officials feared the premium would be quite high due to Ed Carpenter being THAT close two years in a row at Kentucky Speedway.

"We're taking it all into consideration," said the Indy insider. "But, I swear, if I hear one more person ask me if 'my business assets are at risk' I may flip out."

Comments

[The Speedgeek]

Was the $20 million for the double ever an official thing, though? There were rumors of it happening, and Bruton and Randy both talked about it in the press, but never in a "we're having a press conference, here is how it is going to work, here's a bunch of PR boilerplate about how we're rewarding all-around driving excellence, blah, blah, blah". Not to say it won't happen for this year (or next, or whenever), just that I don't think it was ever official.

[Mike Rice]

CLASSIC Pressdog. Great stuff, Mr. 'dog.